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Social Connection Physical Distancing | Notes From 3/23/20 Free Chat with CCM

What’s working for you and what’s not?
-whether or not to be surrogate teachers for children
-how much time outside vs screen time??
-kids being isolated from their friends, parents needing to be more of a playmate, more role shifting
-getting outside a couple of times a day is super helpful
-How to draw boundaries between work and non work when you aren’t changing the physical environment, the work version of eating between meals, doing more work just because you can, and the normal boundaries you have set up don’t matter somehow
-people are more productive during the day if they do a morning routine, shower, dress, breakfast…. Maintaining structure makes a big difference, keeps you from feeling sluggish
Act like you are getting ready to greet the world makes a big difference
Relationships
Loneliness causing people to reach out,
How do you set up boundaries?
Ask yourself, what do you want?
Find social support that feels good to you elsewhere
Shift from trying to focus on what that other persons motivations are versus what are your desires, your values and your motivations
Having personal drama can serve as a diversions when we are dealing with really real issues
Relational drama sucks the life out of us
How to deal with negative thoughts when there is no distraction??
How do you stay connected??
Name what’s going on in this moment, “I’m anxious and that’s ok”
In the next moment we have a choice with what to do with this emotion
Take a walk? Reach out to a friend?
If you don’t get grounded you can’t think what are options are
If you just acknowledge and gently turn your attention to something else you have a better chance of making that shift
Ask yourself, what time period am I in with my thoughts??
A lot of our suffering right now is because of future based thoughts
Notice future based thoughts and don’t judge that but bring yourself back to the present moment
Future based thoughts are really what’s bringing you suffering not the actual present moment
Giving yourself permission to just be
Having a hard time enjoying the things you used to, what to do?
Fake it until you make it
Momentum, staring is the hardest part
If you can just push through that starting period that’s the hardest part then the rest will take care of itself
Noticing that doing something does make you feel better
Break big tasks into small chunks and cut yourself some slack
Dating right now?
Ask yourself how are you feeling in the interactions? And afterwards?
Someone who is pushing to meet, probably you should weed them out of your pool
Sounds like their judgment is compromised if that’s what’s they are pushing for when it is so ill advised
How to deal with a partner or spouse has different ideas of social distancing is and should be
Continue to own you point of view as well as honor the other persons
Try to understand any piece of truth that is in their point of view
Set boundaries but understand various points of view
How to avoid distractions??
Set a schedule
Avoid multitasking because it takes time to reclamation to what your doing
Control the environment as much as possible
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